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Saturday, 30 April 2011

Prejudice: a personal story

In her eloquent and shocking response to my previous post, Kitty encouraged fellow bloggers to post their personal stories of bullying and prejudice. I am a little apprehensive about posting this - this blog isn't really supposed to be about me, but I guess I do throw in the occasional personal-based post here and there (and a heck of a lot of 'hey guys, guess what I've been up to!' introductory paragraphs or P.S.'s) so to hell with it.

I attended a small Church of England primary school, with no more than 100 pupils the whole time I was there. I was pretty quiet; I loved creative writing, reading, and art, and whilst school per se was not my favourite thing, I was happy enough to attend and, as far as I am aware, didn't cause any trouble the entire time I was there. Yes, so I was the 'weird kid' for my taste in clothes (I hadn't yet discovered Goth, but I used to wear such oddities as rainbow-striped trousers and silver platform boots - not together, I might add - on own-clothes days), and often felt as though I didn't quite belong (but doesn't every kid?) but I had my fair share of friends and was content.

Secondary school was a whole different league. Whilst I found my footing with a group of friends who also appreciated unusual fashion, I couldn't get into the music that the 'populars' listened to, wasn't interested in smoking, drugs or promiscuity, and had the apparently offensive tendency to dye my hair different colours and have it lopped into a pixie cut. Short hair meant I was a lesbian. Orange hair meant I was a freak. The rock band hoodies and blue leather jacket I wore meant I was a loser. I worked hard and got good grades so I was a boffin. My group of friends shrank in exact inverse ratio to my growing dissatisfaction with mainstream culture.

The bullying started with name-calling - weirdo, freak, lesbian, loser - and a few particularly scathing comments still ring in my ears (if that isn't too melodramatic). I was also experiencing some troubles with my dad's wife and her family, which had led to me developing some eating-disordered behaviours and self-harming tendencies (after I left school I was referred to a physiotherapist for several years, and not to be too flippant about it but I'm feeling much better now, thanks very much).

When the cuts on my forearms were noticed in the girls' changing rooms, word spread and all hell broke loose. It was like a switch had been flipped, and what had been a few kids calling me names now felt like my entire peer group turning against me. I was locked in the girls' bathrooms for two hours. Once whilst I was standing outside the school building chatting to some friends, a boy with a baseball cap pulled low over his face and his hood up used an aerosol and a lighter to launch a fireball at me. I dread to think what would have happened if I'd been standing any closer.

A close friend of mine (who also suffered from self-harm) and I were surrounded by a group of at least a dozen of our schoolmates in a corridor, all chanting (non-sensically) 'murderers, murderers'. Once I stood up for one of my younger friends who was being chased by a group of older girls, pushing one of the girls away from her, and what seemed like her entire class fenced me in so she could deliver a good slap round my face.

I became too afraid to eat in the school canteen. I began to act up in lessons so that I would be sent out, to avoid my desk mates constantly kicking me in the shin and having (of all things) egg sandwiches thrown at me. I became quieter and quieter at home and more and more disruptive at school.

Once in a geography lesson, the boy next to me stabbed me in the forearm with a compass. I can't remember precisely what happened, but I was sent out of the lesson and given a detention. Which I refused to attend. So I was given another detention. Which I did not attend. I was taken aside by the teacher and asked if I was having problems at home. I was too shell-shocked to point out that I was having chairs thrown at me and 'lesbian', 'freak' and 'bitch' chanted at me by almost the entire class right under her nose. I just walked way.

I began bunking off school, feigning illness or just spending the entire day skulking around town. My parents contacted the school, who 'had a word' with the bullies. Well, we all know what that does.

When I walked into French class at the start of my third year of secondary school, I froze in horror when I realised I was being seated next to the worst of the bullies. I asked the teacher to change the seating plan but she refused. During the entire lesson he held his nose and complained at the top of his voice that I 'smelt of meat because I was a lesbian', scrawled 'cuts' on my arms in pen, and eventually wrote 'LESBIAN' across the cover of my French book.

The teacher went ballistic. At ME. For defiling my French book. She told me to leave the room and gave me a detention.

That was the last straw. I shouted in her face that she was fucking stupid if she thought I'd done that to my own book, stormed out of the class, walked out of the school - and never went back. It was my third day of year nine. My mum found me at home in semi-hysterics, and pulled me out of the school system the very next day, after conferring with my headteacher, who thought that I would find the situation even worse at a different school.

I was home-schooled between the ages of thirteen and eighteen, during which time I discovered Goth culture, got a job, began volunteering, made some great friends, took steps to deal with my 'issues', and realised that, actually, I was never the 'freak'.

Aged 17
Not a freak, just a girl ^^

41 comments:

Julietslace said...

Nawh bubsy :( I hate that schools never actually pay attention, I was never bullied because I was different but then again the uniform was so strict.

It just disgusts me that the schools never do anything, just because of WHY alternative's are bullying.

Maeam said...

Hell. I can't imagine what you and Kitty went through...! I just can't imagine...

Anonymous said...

Man, that's what I hate about being like this. You can't be you without others putting you down.

Kitty Lovett; A Charming Notion said...

Love you dearly, Tabby, m'girl. I'm glad you posted this, because it also reassured me that at least I wasn't the only person to just kind of...not...show up to school anymore.

Funnily enough, I was rarely called a lesbian. Once by a guy, to which I responded, "At least I wouldn't have to dig for your atrophied microdick under all of that gutfat", and twice by girls, which got a "honey, even if I was, I would never touch you. Sorry." I did get a lot of "are you bisexual?" (which I am) How is that your business, some...apparently ten-year-old? At least I'm getting some reguardless of gender.

I still urge all you guys to post stories, even if they're not as bad as these. I forgot to mention in my post about the occasional self-harm, but they only happened in my lovely phychotic blackouts. If I can't remember it, it doesn't count.

☥Viktoria Nightshade☥ said...

That is horrible! I have actually ditched school because I don't want to hear anyone's shit. People stare at me, point and laugh and a few times I've been called a "Scary bitch". I don't see why people put so much effort into being hateful

Kitty Lovett; A Charming Notion said...

Viktoria - sadly enough, it's because they're bored. Take heart in what I do - we're better than them, and while they're in their ghetto brick house with the messy yard in their drug-induced stupor, we'll be off doing important things!

Amber Dawn said...

It's so much worse when the adults who are there to protect and nurture you are a part of the problem. I went to private Christian schools during almost all of my education. I (thankfully) never had any violent experiences, but I am a very emotional and sensitive person and in response to the way I was treated, I did develop a guilt complex, an eating disorder and frequently had anxiety attacks. The teachers tried to make feel like a bad person because I wore earrings. Or because I like to color my hair unnatural colors. They made me feel like a bad Christian because I questioned the teacher about what they were teaching. And by questions, I don't mean I was disagreeing with them (not at first anyway), but I simply wanted clarification about what we were learning or reasons behind the lessons. See, I went to the private school by choice. I WANTED a Christian education. Every year my parents would ask if I wanted to switch to the public school. By high school I came home in tears nearly 3 days a week. I would say no. (I didn't realize that the "education" I was getting was doing more harm than good. When I finally went to public schools I realized the standards at the private schools was terribly lax. Suddenly I had to work my ass off for grades that normally I got in my sleep.) My experiences in school changed me. When I was little, I was very animated, and outgoing. I loved attention, I loved to sing and wanted very much be a performer of some kind. But in the private school (and church), I was never picked for plays and things. I wasn't one of the rich kids (I did a work study program to help pay for my tuition), or the elders/pastors' kids, so I was pretty much trash. I was rejected and criticized so much that I started to withdraw, and by time high school came around, I was very shy and introverted. And that was just the teachers. In elementary and junior high I had a bully. I think she fixated on me because I was very gullible and trusting. When we were alone, she pretended to be my friend, but when other kids were around, she would do a 180. She used things I said in confidence against me, she played pranks on me and started lies about me. She called me names. In fact she was the first person to ever call me fat, and this was BEFORE I was ever overweight. The scary thing is, all of this happened before I even became openly goth. It's something I was always curious about, but in the Christian schools Goth equals Satanist. So I didn't pursue it, out of fear. It wasn't until college that I started to understand what it was all about, and it wasn't until about 3 years ago, that really accepted that it was part of who I am. I'm 27 now. That's a long time to hide who you are from yourself. I'm very blessed in that I have parents and a brother (and since college, a few close friends) who are very excepting of me and love me for exactly who I am. Otherwise, I don't know how I would have made it through.

Ophelia Black said...

I can't believe people could be so horrible. I'm the only goth in my school, although there are a few emos and punks and we all get mashed together, but I've never been the subject of any bullying. You should sue the school for allowing these things to happen. No one deserves that. And people wonder why goths are supposedly so depressed.

Rora Monroe said...

this story is heart braking but sadly it happens. I was bullied since I started school all the way till I entered highschool and people got bored of me. the most of this happend in 7th and 8th grade where my gothy self started to reveal its self in full bloom. The taunts started with every student in my class saying I had cuts on my arm and was Emo. At the time I wasn't but having it thrown at me everyday drove me to serious self-harm that wond me up in therapy and still is a stuggle for my everyday life. Once the whole emo thing died down (sort of anyway) they all found out that I was pagan and would yell "Jesus Loves You!" at me from the halls. to say the leaste thouse where the worst years of my life and was glad when it finaly stop. Your story touched me and I'm sorry you were litterly drove out of school for your teenage years. Some humans discust me to no end.

Ms. Lou said...

I'm sorry you went through such a terrible time. I experienced some bullying to, living in a small town, where people expect you to conform, but nothing like this. You are a talented and beautiful person, so don't let this hold you back in any way. Remember living well is the best revenge.

Anonymous said...

I was always made fun of in elementry school for being a loser.
7th grade came along and my goth side started to come out. As did my severe social anxiety.
I never talked much, I've always had socializing problems.
People decided it was so hilarious that I wore eyeliner, which is where it started. I ignored the insults, which I guess made it funnier.
This started getting so bad I promised myself I'd go on a homocidal rampage. Well, I told people that. Admitted I wanted to kill them.
Here I started ----

Anonymous said...

--- to get physically tormented. Stuff was thrown at me, people would hit me, shove me, kick me..
This is where I snapped and went crazy. I was planning out the day I'd kill everyone. I started to scare my own friends, who were also bullied severely.
Well, the school found out and sent me to therapy. (Thank god they noticed something was wrong, I could have easily been expelled) There I got worse, I wanted to kill myself. So I stopped going.

Eventually I did get better. But I still have a lot of ------

Anonymous said...

--- problems. My social anxiety got worse and worse until last year I, yet again, went crazy. I never slept, I tripped balls, I never looked at or talked to anyone. BUT I've got meds for it now, I'm MUCH better. :3 My depression got worse, (also better by the meds :D) and other various anger problems got worse.

I'm much better now. People forgot about the past and what they did to me, and everyone likes me now, despite my new gothier way of dress. c:

(my phone only lets me type 512 characters, sorry!)

Pixie said...

I will never understand how someone can notice a person cuts themselves and the reaction is to tease and not get help.

And don't get me started on how teachers and schools don't help the situation. I attended two different high schools and I noticed that in both any teacher who was genuinely concerned for students was soon without job.

Lady Alice Arsenic said...

Sorry, lurker here who's always wanted to comment but never really got around to it. Anyway.
I was lucky enough to never have gotten physical abuse, but what teasing I did get made me want to commit suicide in third grade. I moved into my school from a private, non-religious school where I knew everybody into a school where I only knew one person. It was really a decent enough school, not counting the students. Obviously. I was one of the smartest kids and people seem to generally find me attractive, but I guess something was off with me and I started to be teased. Aside from the few who supported me, there were also the kids who didn't do anything, which honestly made it worse. My teachers and parents were supportive, but it didn't seem to make any difference. I became increasingly shy and socially awkward, and no matter how I tried to fit in, I never did. I never really recovered from it. I guess it must have been my interest in bugs, general geekdom, and general ignorance of what the popular kids liked. Honestly, I still don't know, nor to I get mainstream fashion. Which is why I'm here. Or most music for that matter...
Thankfully, when I was just about to go into middle school, I was put into special ed, and when the little switch in me clicked and I started wearing black, the worst thing I heard from people was them calling me a witch. They just usually avoided me, really.
I wonder, for all of you who were picked on, what was the response from school? I went and told them who the main bullies were, and she just said that they were nice boys and she couldn't imagine them doing THAT. Ugh. Apparently, this is a standard response for them, and I'm not the only one from that school who got that response either. :/

Emily Lynn G. said...

"Short hair meant I was a lesbian"
YES that happened to me to!!
And my brother also almost got set on fire just for being the only white kid in his mostly black high school. But all jokes aside, Miss Amy, you've come a long way. You're a inspiration to someone like me. I don't have a lot of subculture role models but you seem to be one :) Like I said before, I'm really lucky now...now I just wish I wasn't the only goth kid and I had somebody to talk about my interests with :(

deepoblivion99 said...

Hi miss Amy! I am a stalker to your blog! XD Sorry, Im a middle school babybat with no other goths in her shool, so i rely on this blog!

Anyways, I have a very very understanding school. My mother is a teacher at the elementary so she knows my teaxhers and my teachers trust me and respect. They often compliment me on my black velvet skirts and victorian hats! I know my classmates and they only smile and call me goth, teasig of coarse! Ive known them since first grade and strangely Im friends with everyone! I have jock friends, band friends, cheerleader friends, and its nice. Ive never had any troubles because of my awesome parents :) Though I get pissed off very very easily, Ive never had any problems with self harm o depression. :D
~Your loyal follower, Pudding

Becky said...

What is with these idiot teachers?!! I'm sorry you got stuck with a bunch of morons for authority figures.

Joe said...

Wow that sounds horrible, I'm sorry you had to go through all that crap :( It's good you got to get out of that hell though, that's good you have great parents who love you. I never really got bullied for clothing choices (could be because my parents made me wear what everyone else was wearing, and I never even knew some of the cool gothic clothing was even out there) but I do remember getting bullied a few times for being so shy (it wasn't that bad though, just a few people called me some names sometimes). Lol short hair means you're a lesbian, it could be worse. My mom thought one of my friends was a guy because she had short hair.

Hexotica said...

So horrible. I would be just as pissed off at the blindness of the teacher as I would be at the bullies themselves!
I just posted an article that links to this one, as an illustration on how mainstream mentality actively tries to destroy alternative culture.
I'm glad you understood that it was the situation you were in among ignorant people that was the problem; not at all because of who you are or the values that you have followed in being goth.

The Fool said...

It's a terrible story... It's always the outcasts own fault for being bullied in the teacher's eyes...

This is one of the reasons I'm very happy I didn't discover goth and started dressing it until I moved away from home to study (17 and up). I found my group of friends (of all different kinds and styles) from different classes and we stayed by ourselves during breaks so we never had to endure any talk from classmates except the occational "why are they dressing like that?", "Freaks." comments and nasty looks. But hey. It's their loss from not wanting to get to know us better, because we certainly were awesome! =D

Now, when I'm in the university, my classmates are grown up and just find it fun that I show up to class with flowing black dresses, lace and mis-matching socks. =P

daisy.fiend said...

Yea, some teachers are just as horrible as the kids. This girl was shouting in my face "Lesiban" "Satain Lover" "Whore" and so on. The teacher was right next to us and she didn't even raise a eyebrow.

Angel of Darkness said...

It's sad that you have such a bad time in school. I know a friend of mine in my small group who was the new girl at WEst Highschool 10th grade year (this year) and told us not too long ago what had been going on, she was bullied to the point that SHE almost go suspended for them telling teachers she had a knife, and those bullies put the knife in her backpack. No one believed it wasn't her knife. And even though Skyview is a prepy school she never got bullies there. It's just not right.

I have never been actaully bullies, just forgotten, ignored, and invisible.

Stefanie said...

I don't get how being Goth equals being a lesbian?

The teachers never do anything though. I was bullied throughout secondary school for being fat (being Gothically minded came later though I always loved the scene), initially by former friends then by a load other kids, most of them in the year below.

One teacher just told us to basically make friends and that I should get over it. I ended up faking being ill to get of school an awful lot which wrecked my grades and I ended up doing 2 extra years to try and pass Maths and English.

Several times while it was going on I did consider suicide and I cut my legs a couple of times but it never really helped.

And the habit of skiving has stuck with me even though while I'm still fat the bullying stopped years ago, and it almost made me fail my college course.

Cat Rocketship said...

Oh boy, I'm THAT person now -- leaving contact info in a comment. Sorry for doing this, but I couldn't find another way to contact you!

I'm the editor of Offbeat Home and I found your blog today as I was skipping through the wonderland of the web. Offbeat Home covers all things not in the mainstream of having a home, housekeeping, decor and philosophies -- and we do it with guest posts. I feel like you might have posts to contribute, and I'd love to read them.

Take a look at our submissions page to start. If you have any questions, drop me a line: cat@offbeatempire.com

x-akurei said...

Well, that was certainly a very happy story. :| Oh, no, I can only just begin to imagine how horrible that must have been. At my school, it actually isn't so bad - despite the fact that everyone is well aware of how I dress, my religion and my sexuality. A couple of years ago it was a little scary to walk through the corridors without the aid of friends, but it has never been dangerous to do so... It's strange, considering that 95% of the population in my town is the narrow-minded, unemployed, homophobic type that spend their life drowning in alcohol and drugs and beating people up. For once, after hearing your story, I am actually finding myself greatful for the place in which I live.

ultimategothguide said...

@ Cat Rocketship - thanks very much ^^ if I turn up anything suitable, I will certainly pop over and submit it!

Gulag said...

Stories like this break my heart and strike a very personal chord, as I am different, I have Asperger's Syndrome, and have been bullied and discriminated by children and adults alike for pretty much my whole life.

March Hare said...

I got bullied at school too for being different, every single year it was the same thing but my parents refused to pull me out so I suffered it for seven years, the irony is that the pupils doing it were junkies and tramps hardly people to start pointing the finger.
I was called many horrible names including lesbian though I wasn't one, bat girl, the girl with the crazy hair, witch, Morticia Adams and others and the teachers meant to help, well one of them said I looked liked Ozzy Osbourne and tried to bully me into playing him in a play and when I got someone else who wanted to do it to do it she yelled at me.
Needless to say I also self-harmed, spent pretty much every night crying, went without friends because I didn't trust anyone and many of my so called friends became the bullies over the years (not because of my weirder persona but because we hung out in a bitchy girl group and every year someone became the outsider)and I begged my parents to pay for my hair to be done so I would stop being bullied because it was frizzy.
I may have survived the seven hellish years there but I will always resent my parents for never pulling me out and hope that the school is closed down because its teachers aren't fit to run it and it now has a wide reputation for being a school of junkies with rich parents.
Quite simply I'm not the least bit forgiving about any of it. Also, I too had one of the bullies light an aerosol and try to aim the fire ball at me, this was under the desk in Chemistry class and the teacher never once noticed.

Anonymous said...

My school is run by morons and Football fans. Also, I live in the Bible belt. It infuriates me to no end that schools can be so incompetent. If I ever have kids, I will personally see to their education.

The Tenth Muse said...

That's really terrible. I have the good fortune of living in a town where people can be judgmental but are never physically disrespectful, and bullying very rarely happens because of the way a person looks. There's a lot of tolerance for alternative subculture. And when people self-harm, most people are sympathetic and the rest keep it to themselves. (Unfortunately there is a LOT of self-harm...)

Anonymous said...

That must feel like somebody stole your wallet,...Awful.
One time, In sixth grade last year, The teacher's daughters friend told me to show her my wrists because " I might've slit them or something"
but the worst thing was is that THE TEACHER...LAUGHED

AdamAfterMidnight said...

Reading this brought me to the verge of crying. I feel I can relate to being bullied and taunted in school. I was bullied all throughout middle and high school for being the quiet kid who read too much and had no friends. Luckily I have since come out of my shell and just recently realized that I am a goth at heart, if I had dressed goth in high-school I wonder if I would have made it through at all. Congrats to you on getting through the torment and turning out to be such a brilliant person.

Anonymous said...

I do get bullied in school, but it's been going on my whole life, even before i became goth, But in one of my old schools (I've changed schools a lot because my family keeps moving.) when i'd started wearing darker colors and listening to goth type music, It got pretty bad. A group of boys chased me up a tree during recess (and knowing i have an aversion to swarming insects)placed a log covered with big ants at the base of the tree so they started climbing up. I was absolutely terrified and ended up going so far out on one branch that it broke and i fell to the ground. I wasn't hurt though, Thank God. I was only about ten then. I was sexually abused a year later by my brother's friend's older brother because he thought i'd be ''easy''. What's easy about black pants and t-shirts? I wasn't even really a goth yet. I'm about 15 now and i do get occasional insults but nothing worse. Although i do get stopped in the streets by people who want to convert me, or who think i'm satanist or wiccan (I'm actually a christian) And my brothers are very gothophobic which results in some teasing from them. Some of the stuff i've been through(facebook account getting hacked, suicide jokes, mean prep bitches yadayada) a lot of people don't consider that as bad as what other people have suffered, but it's still scarring. It feels better to write about it anonymously than talk to some counselor.

Anonymous said...

it makes me so angry to read of this prejudice. I'm 40 now but have been alt. since very young, My family moved country when I was 10 & I got racially bullied & physically attacked. At 11 I became vegetarian - got bullied for that. Slowly over the years I got angrier & angrier, more introvert & withdrawn, at 11 I started self harming - my home life was a shambles & school was slowly getting worse. I discovered piercing my own ears instead of self harm - it made me smile & feel good (have got 19 earrings of which 15 I did myself) I dyed my hair red, orange, orange & green! The bullies had a field day. I made friends with some lads who were always getting expelled & this was their fourth school - they taught me not to give a sh*t & to punch! After they got expelled I learned how to bunk off. I had serious depression & mental issues by now so bunking off was much better, also we had no uniform & I was tall & looked older than I was, so was never questioned. Got my first tattoo at 17- had left school by them & had a job. Got abuse shouted at me for being a freak because I wore all black & had green & black hair. Eventually after finding a nightclub with folk like me at 18 I became a fully fledged tattooed pierced "freak" - shaved nearly all my hair off, bought some big bad steelcaps, took up thai boxing & following an incident when a so called friend raped me, I became demonically angry, was regularly in fights & hated the world. got called all sorts of names, lesbian, freak, SLut, SLag,Tranny,pseudo punk & regularly asked "are you a bloke?". eventually I left Australia & all the Xenophobes. I now live in London. I look more extreme now than I ever have- you could say its the full monty.. :o) But Im happy & confident & people must notice, because I get treated differently now. I get asked for a lot of pics - I dont mind, because people are so fascinated by the way I look & I feel that I am an ambassador for the alt community. I want to show people that we aint whatever stereotype weve been labelled with - we're just colourful artistic individuals, who dont want to look like Barbie or Ken. The really odd thing is that the more extreme I look, the more respect & compliments. Maybe its because I walk up the road laughing because I DO DARE to be different. Hold your head up high, dont be afraid to stand up for yourself, if all else fails buy steel capped boots & learn thai boxing.
Peace, Love & courage to all of you.

Lilyth_Von_Gore said...

Reading all these stories... It makes me sick to think how ignorant and judgemental some people really are.
I've been a part of the goth lifestyle since I was 12. It was Hell for me. I'd been bullied all through primary school, long before I discovered what goth even was, and when I started wearing darker clothes and make-up, it seemed to get worse. I've been beaten up, locked in the school bathrooms, shoved down stairs, cornered behind the school building, yelled at by both students and teachers. I lost a friend who was beaten to death for the way she dressed at my school and the police did nothing about it. Sure they investigated, but there wasn't enough evidence.

I left school at the age of 16. I went straight into college and the judging started all over again.

When I heard about poor Sophie Lancaster, that made me even more determined to be who I'd always been, regardless of what anyone, including my Grandparents, thought.

Now, at the age of 20, I don't goth up as much as I used to. I realised that you don't have to wear dark clothing and make-up to be a goth.

whitewitchgoth said...

MY SISTER AND I STILL GET VERBALLY ASAULTED IN THE STREET. OR EVEN IN PUBLIC PLACES. NOTHING HAS CHANGED. PEOPLE ARE STILL CRUEL AND CALOUS. IT IS 2012 AND ENGLAND HAS ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS, TO MANY OUTSIDERS. MY SISTER AND I DO NOT EVEN LOOK GOTHY NOW. AND YET WE STILL GET A LOT OF HASSLE AND ABUSE OFF STRANGERS WE DON'T RELATE TO. OFTEN, MY SISTER AND I HAVE TO OVER-EMPHASIZE OURSELVES TO THE NEUROTYPICAL PEOPLE OUT THERE IN OSWESTRY TOWN. SOMETHING ISN'T RIGHT WITH ENGLAND. YOU CAN SENSE THAT PEOPLE ARE JEALOUS OF ALL US OUTCASTS/OUTSIDERS. THERE SHOULD BE A LAW COURT FOR OUTCASTS/OUTSIDERS AND THE DISABLED. EITHER THAT, OR WE SHOULD HAVE A COUNCIL OF GOTHIC FREEDOMS.

Anonymous said...

Thankyou for sharing your story, i love your blog by the way, i'm 17 and have been a Goth for 2 years, i'm the resident freak at my school, your story was so moving to me, and i just wanted to post a comment and say thankyou.

Jazz

Dorian F. said...

It does my heart good to see another "strange" creature overcoming their obstacles, to become themselves. I had to endure a very similar experience, only my parents were a part of the problem. Keep going, and keep helping others. I'm sure there are many who benefit from you, and your blog.

Anonymous said...

I'm new to the goth lifestyle and my family just thinks I'm going through the " seventh grade emo stage " a grade early, but I probably will be bullied when I change schools next year. Presently I am going to a private Christian school but I'll be going to a magnet school next yea for art /*( ' 3 ' )*\. I'm saying this because I'm a bit on the odd side ( as in the weirdo who sometimes dresses like punky Brewster and a goth kid and is just playing weird). But in fifth grade I tried to commit suicide ( I can't even remember what started it). I tried to jump out of the car when I was in hysterics. But it seemed like everything was crashing down on me. I was sent to the crisis center ( which was really cold, I might add) and spent the night there ( totally pointless unless they wanted me to die of hypothermia) but now I realize how stupid that was, even though life sucks completely. But now at my new school things are fine I guess. But I've been doing a lot of research on stories like this and see my problems were pale in comparison. But people have a lot of problems and society is as stupid as ever, I mean listen to the bullying commercials, and yet stuff like this happens. Teachers don't do shit!
But, I am very sorry all this has happened to you. * Virtual hugs * \* ( ' • ' ) */
Your unknown friend, Lily

Anonymous said...

You should have never had to go through that. What's wrong with short hair? How does that automatically translate to "lesbian"? In all honesty, that's just ignorance and refusal to accept a peer with original style. And that fireball thing? That's just sick and wrong! More power to you for overcoming.

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