Thursday, 11 August 2011

How dare her brother date a Goth?!

Perhaps I should stop poking my nose in to random episodes of web-based stupidity, but I'm not entirely sure that I can help myself. First we had Perez Hilton's moronic fans picking on poor Adora; then there was the ridiculous 'Muslims can't be Goth' debacle. Now some poor person on Teh Interwebz is butthurt because their brother wants to date a Goth girl. Shock. Horror.

Asks 'Poor', "How do I stop my brother from dating a Goth chick?", and elaborates, "A Goth chick? My brother is a freaking idiot, how do I stop this?"

Answers include, "Tell him that she's cheating on him," and "Tell him that Goth people worship the devil."

Yes! Dammit, how dare your brother be able to see past appearances and make his own decisions about who to date! This is awful! Let's ask strangers on the internet to make comments on his personal life (as, incidentally, I am now doing) because surely, YOU should have final choice in who your brother is allowed to date. Obviously. /endsarcasm

The thing that freaks me out most about this is not the fact that Poor clearly feels that one must be a 'freaking idiot' in order to date a Goth (gee, thanks) but that they think it's perfectly all right for them to try to sabotage their sibling's love life. Harsh, much? I wonder what said brother would think if he happened to stumble across Poor's post whilst browsing.

Anyway, as I have mentioned before, there is no reason (other than, apparently, scarily judgemental siblings) why Goths and non-Goths cannot have successful and loving relationships. (Here's me and my non-Goth boyfriend of seven years.) If Poor bothered to get to know this Goth girl, they might discover that she is probably much like many other girls, and likely to enjoy reading, music, dancing, movies, make-up and fashion, which Poor would probably be able to identify with if they hadn't taken one look at her and assumed her interests were limited to Scary Goff Things.

Source: Tumblr
Believe it or not, Goth 'chicks' are people too.


EcoGoth said...

Wow...this is, indeed, very sad. Very similar to a situation I encountered in high school dating a non-goth who was almost afraid to be seen holding my hand at school. I later broke it off and he went on to inform the rest of his friends that he dumped me because I was into too much "scary" and "kinky" stuff.

Here's to hoping that Poor's bro ignores his sister's dramatic plight and goes on to have a happy relationship with his gf.

Krystal said...

I'm just sick in general of people trying to make other people feel bad about themselves.

I lost several of the people I'd considered to be my best friends for *years* when (and *because*) I began discovering my spooky inclinations. I got over it pretty quick even though I was fairly young because, really, who needs people like that?

PS: Keep an eye out for an email from The Zombified- I think I sometimes get caught up in junk filters :)

Cody said...

People are ridiculous. I have been accused of "turning guys goth", and it never fails to bother me.

Luna said...

There's always someone. I've been with my boyfriend for almost six years now, and for the most part, his family has never complained when I've dragged my blue-haired self to functions in bright red eyeshadow and torn-up skinny jeans, the only word they've spoken to my dark lipstick and Robert Smith-esque shock-headed hairstyles has been "outrageous." But his brother is getting married and his fiancee is quite clearly trying to deliberately leave me out of the wedding. Honestly, I don't care--that's a few less expensive gifts I need to give her--but I know it's all based on appearances, and that makes me sad for her as a person.

It's sort of nuts that this subculture has been around for so long (it's not like we just started popping up last year) and still there is so much misinformation. Also? I had no idea about the Perez Hilton/Adora thing. I didn't realize he was so anti-free-will.

Nightwind said...

It's sad that this type of thing happens, but I suppose that it goes with the turf. I mean let's face it, we view things differently and I for one, am proud of it. Society strives for conformity however, and far too many insecure people attempt to feel good about themselves by denegrating others. Being goth is not for the faint of heart.

VictorianKitty (Sophistique Noir) said...

Whatever juvenile, misdirected soul advised Poor to tell their brother that his gf is cheating on him apparently is not able to judge the consequences of their actions. Yeah, it's worth it for Poor's Brother to not only be badly hurt by a horrific false accusation, but to potentially go on develop a deep-seated mistrust and maybe even a hatred of women. But it's better than having him date a Goth!!!

Phells said...

(Although not entirely surprised..) I can't believe the commentators. Yes, let's encourage the girl to lie to her brother so that just maybe he'll break up with a girl he could potentially really like. It's just his heart we're talking about here. And her's for that matter. Chances are that if he was willing to date a goth girl in the first place, he'll just get mad at Poor for not giving his girlfriend a chance anyway.

gin said...

I wonder if someone should post to her ridiculous request about how she should not only leave her brother alone, but some actual have a "thing" for the darkly inclined and give her the links to how to pick up goths. That might really set her off. ^_^

AdamAfterMidnight said...

I just want to let you know that at about 2:30am local time I stumbled upon your blog completely by accident (I was Googling how to get a job as a goth) <---(Embarrasing), and I just happened upon a link to your blog. I am 21 and a definite "babybat" and your blog is the single most amazing resource I have encountered in my almost-one-year foray into Gothdom. I absolutely adore you, your style, and especially the way you write. Thank you so much for doing what you do, I can't wait to soak up every tidbit of wisdom you have here!!! - Your newest overeager fan, Adam

akumaxkami said...

I hope Poor's brother and this "Goth chick" have a wonderful relationship. Not only because I think that would be great if they really like each other, but also just to spite Poor.

Anonymous said...

you have a great blog but writing about this sort of thing seems a bit....dunno, over stretching it? please dont take offense but I mean WHO CARES if a very small handful of people are against this? its hardly an earth shattering revelation. There are many more interesting things to write about in regards to our culture then someone having a problem with their brother dating a goth chick, I mean really? you've already addressed goths dating non-goths brilliantly, you've covered numerous topics of prejudice. This post seems a tad unnecessary in the bigger picture (not particularly helpful or very interesting)

Again please dont take any offense your blog is brilliant and ive been reading for many, many months. I found the "Male goth style icons" very helpful. Heck I dont even mind the "goth challenge" posts. But this seems a bit much. Disappointing :( oh well. I hope my criticism is constructive in the least. Sorry to be a downer amy.

Lady Of Gothica said...

hey..thanx for looking and leaving ur link at my blog..and i love urs too!!

Kitty Lovett; The Unadulterated Cat said...

Anon: "I mean WHO CARES if a very small handful of people are against this?"

Obviously, we do. You are clearly kind of a nong. Don't like these kinds of posts? Good for yopu, you special little snowflake! don't read them then. Or you could read and then complain about someone's opinions on their personal blog, where they can make personal comments on whatever they please. Ugh. /defensiveofamy

As for the original post, Amy, I bless your saintliness. I'd have told the girl to go suck a fuck. :3

On a more pleasant note that might cheer you up - i think I'm going to start putting the Victorians forum up today and sorting out all other web-basities!

Anonymous said...

People like that are creepy

ultimategothguide said...

@ AdamAfterMidnight - You just made my day! <33333

@ Anon - cheers for the honesty and constructive criticism; I do try and post a little bit of everything and get a lot of mixed reactions. Sorry for disappointing a long-term reader - will try and do better. ;-)

Also, 'don't mind' the Goth challenge posts? I just thought they were a bit of fun. I hope they don't get too much for anyone, I thought it was a nice idea.

@ Kitty - whoa. Defensive Kitty is defensive. And a little scary. o.O But thanks for springing to my defense.

Heh. Me, saintly? You shoulda seen me slap the hormonal pre-teen that peeked at me in the changing room yesterday. :-P

Yayy! <3

ultimategothguide said...

@ Lady of Gothica - thank you! And you're welcome. :-D

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